Frequently Asked Questions

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How do we deal with obnoxious behaviour?

We really hate to say this, but, now that the site is so large, it is almost inevitable that there are some instances of "inconsiderate" behaviour. We trust members of our site to be courteous, civilised and honest. All members are effectively our personal, albeit virtual guests, and we expect them to respect our hospitality! Regrettably, this trust is sometimes breached, for which we are very sorry. Because we cannot review each profile, (and your messages are private!), if something is offensive we will not necessarily know about it. That is why there is a link "Is this profile/message rude or offensive? Please tell Cupid" on each profile/message. (You can only see this if you are logged in.) Please do report things - we are a community, and it is in everyone's interest - the administrators will act as soon as we can. Fortunately, such instances are rare, and GraduateRomance should usually be highly enjoyable for everyone :-)

In the event that you receive an offensive message, we ask that you let us know as soon as possible. This is important - we can only act if you tell us, and otherwise a very few people can spoil things for everyone else. Please don't delete the message so that we have evidence. Ideally, please use the "Is this profile/message rude or offensive? Please tell Cupid" link, which will automatically preserve a copy. We will then, as quickly as we can, ask the sender for an explanation (we try to be even-handed); depending on their response, we will consider what action to take. As appropriate, we will ask the sender to modify their behaviour, or we will delete the offender's account and block them from the site. Once a member is barred from the site, then (unless we have made an error), the ban is permanent.

Unkind, obnoxious, hurtful or crude messages are not acceptable. The senders of such are likely to be barred.
If you see anything offensive in a person's profile, please tell us - we'll review it, and request that they modify it.
If a profile is misleading, false, or placed in the wrong category, the account will be terminated and the user will be permanently barred from using our site.
We also take a very dim view of pranks and "practical jokes", because they very often cause serious offense, even if "meant in fun".
We really despise hate mail, and will (if asked by the recipient), trace the sender: there are appropriate legal channels for doing so.
Bullying of any sort is intolerable - and will result in a ban. It can only continue if it goes unreported - so please, tell us if you see it happen.
In the extreme case, there is also a clear University policy on Harassment: at both university and college level.
Please see the legal bit for more details. You may also email us at: abuse@ruo3.org.

It is also possible for you to block messages from a particular person: please see how to decline.

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